Horns

Rewatched this movie today and completely broke down, sobbing at this scene. This is taken from the script.

Dear Ig...


You'll never read  this while I'm alive.  I'm not even sure I want you  to read it after I'm dead.  I think you're gonna ask me to marry you soon.  You don't know how much I want to say yes. But I can't. The thing is, Ig, I'm very sick. The sort of cancer I have is the kind that runs in families. I saw my mother go through it... and I saw what it did to my father. If I tell you I'm sick, you're just gonna wanna marry me even more. And I'll be weak and say yes. Then you'll give up your future and be shackled to me... as I go through hell and die anyway. I won't put you through it. I love you too much.  My plan is to hurt you, just enough to push you away. And hopefully one day you can forgive me...and you will move on to someone else. You'll have children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren. You will go for long walks in the woods. On one of these walks, when you're very old...you'll find yourself at a tree, with a house in its branches. I'll be waiting for you there.  I'll be waiting by candlelight in our treehouse... shining the light of my cross into your eyes. The first message I ever sent you. Us.

I love you, Iggy Perrish.

Your girl, Merrin.

This affected me so much that I can't even read it without crying, sobbing over my own loss, my own mistakes. The first tears I've let fall for her. So here I sit, still crying, dripping snot and blood from my nose, writing this, knowing nothing will make it hurt less, nothing will make me want to die less, nobody will read this, and, most of all, nobody will care.